The day I lost my dignity
Hello my blogging friends,
Last week, the blogging team was given a challenge. This challenge was to share a moment of vulnerability to enhance reading experience. You’ll have to let me know if this works in the comment section.
Without further adieu, I present
The Day I Lost My Dignity: A story of fear, heartache, and embarrassment.
One time last year, I was feeling a little loopy. I had stayed up all night one Monday attempting to get a project done in the 24 hour lab, one of the feature’s in the library on campus. I had classes that day, so I was awake all day Monday, then all night, then all day Tuesday. It was now hour 34 of being awake when the incident happened.
The sun was setting. It was a beautiful day in April. I drove my car over a hill to see some gentlemen preparing for a fish fry. Among the men in this group, I noticed my friend Stephen Rowell in the distance.
In order to fully understand the story, you have to understand all that this Stephen Rowell. You may remember around this time last year, I posted a Vlog featuring an “interview” with Steve. If not, I’ll give you the gist on what kind of guy he is.
Stephen answers to no one. He is his own person. He has looked like he is 35 since his Freshman year and has been mistaken for a parent or professor (as pictured above) on numerous occasions. He was “secretly” in love with me for a good year and I finally had to shoot him straight for him to get the idea. He now is dating an amazing woman of God, and I couldn’t be happier for him!
Stephen isn’t great with schedules. He’s the guy that shows up 10 minutes late to classes regularly but walks in with a Venti Vanilla latte in hand and iPad in arm, greeting anyone and everyone. I wouldn’t call him disruptive, because the professors are usually delighted when he comes in. He’s the guy everyone wants to be around because there’s never any guessing what’s on his mind.
That being said, on this Tuesday late afternoon/evening, I may have had sour feelings toward Mr. Rowell. It may have been because I stayed awake for a meeting with him that he missed. It may have been because he went fishing for this fish fry. He may have had another valid reason for not showing up to said meeting, but none of them mattered. What mattered was how tired I was, and how carefree he was, setting up the grill for the big event of the week.
As my car descended the hill, I stopped when I was level with the crew. I hit my brakes, rolled down my window, and shouted, “STEPHEN!!“
Stephen looked at me like a deer in the headlights. He slowly meandered over to my window, leaned down, and I couldn’t shake the look on his face. He looked troubled, concerned and in doubt. I asked how he was doing, and he began talking aimlessly. Very out of character for him. He was looking down into my car and making little to no eye contact. Whatever was troubling him was far bigger than this missed meeting that was bothering me.
A couple days later, I received a few text messages from Stephen. In this series, he said something to the extent of “Allegra, I think we need to clear the air. I’m sorry I embarrassed you when I crapped my pants in front of you the other day. I hope you know I wasn’t feeling well and it doesn’t happen often. I hope you don’t view me differently because this has never happened before.”
I wasn’t embarrassed by this moment of Stephen’s weirdness until THIS MOMENT. If he wouldn’t have texted me, I would have gone on with my life as normal, but instead, I had my most embarrassing moment in Dewey’s Book and Bean, getting a text that my friend Stephen, soiled his linens, right in front of me, on a Tuesday afternoon.
Over and Out!